remember when baby spice sang about wearing a condom
remember when it took me over a decade to realize what she was singing about
remember when I never realized this until just now
thanks for jizzing all over my childhood. I really needed that.
My, isn’t it awkward that you just fuckin recycled a nearly 40 year old article to shit on this latest generation?
But I do want to say:
Of all the images you could have picked, you chose one of a teenage girl taking a selfie.
Because of course, girls who have been taught nothing else by their elders except that their appearance is what matters are the reason we are all lazy and narcissistic.
Fuck off. You fucking made us. You raised me and my sister and my female cousin and millions and millions of girls to be self-conscious and obsessed with making ourselves look pleasing to men. You taught us that that was our only worth. And now you shit on us for it.
FUCK OFF, TIME.
Angelina Jolie had a double mastectomy, in case you hadn’t heard. How dare she remove those ticking time bombs from her chest, amiright? Like, hasn’t she learned by now that her body is public domain and we all get to vote on what she does with it? Sheesh, how selfish can ya get.
There once was a young boy with a very bad temper. The boy’s father wanted to teach him a lesson, so he gave him a bag of nails and told him that every time he lost his temper he must hammer a nail into their wooden fence.
On the first day of this lesson, the little boy had driven 37 nails into the fence. He was really mad!
Over the course of the next few weeks, the little boy began to control his temper, so the number of nails that were hammered into the fence dramatically decreased.
It wasn’t long before the little boy discovered it was easier to hold his temper than to drive those nails into the fence.
Then, the day finally came when the little boy didn’t lose his temper even once, and he became so proud of himself, he couldn’t wait to tell his father.
Pleased, his father suggested that he now pull out one nail for each day that he could hold his temper.
Several weeks went by and the day finally came when the young boy was able to tell his father that all the nails were gone.
Very gently, the father took his son by the hand and led him to the fence.
“You have done very well, my son,” he smiled, “but look at the holes in the fence. The fence will never be the same.”
The little boy listened carefully as his father continued to speak.
“When you say things in anger, they leave permanent scars just like these. And no matter how many times you say you’re sorry, the wounds will still be there.”
I really want to appreciate this but do you know how much of a bitch it’s gonna be to replace that fence?
THE LAST FUCKING PARAGRAPH NEEDS TO BE SENT TO MY ASSHOLE “FRIENDS”.